Wednesday, 21 September 2016

The Deepest Pain

Sweet Dreams
2016

As a child when I was hurt or upset I would quietly paint or draw. I would escape into my own world to release the pain. I still do.

This morning started like an ordinary day, but I knew it wouldn't be. I had to take our beloved Bearded Collie to the vet for surgery. I have mentioned Bailey so often on my blog and on my workshops. He has been my loyal companion for over thirteen years and I love him unconditionally.

My heart is breaking as I type the news that my  lovable companion is no longer with me. During an operation this morning Cancer was found and the situation was far worse than we expected. We lost our four legged family member and friend, our sweet Bearded Collie this morning.

As in my childhood. I escape via my art. I can't bring my wonderful fluffy pup back to life but I can keep him near me via my brushwork.

My heart is aching so badly.

But I am so grateful for all the years of fun and love we have shared.

Forgive my personal heartfelt blog post.

Sometimes life isn't always perfect.

Dear Bailey, we will miss you with all our hearts. To everyone who loved my beautiful dog,thank you so much for loving him over the years. I am going to miss him terribly.







Goodnight Sweet Friend.


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37 comments:

Rosemary said...

Tears as I read this. So sorry for your great loss. Hugs!

Jeanne Turner McBrayer said...

I am very sad for you. He was indeed a beautiful dog, and your paintings of him will be beautiful reminders of his precious years with you.

Belinda Lamb said...

Holding you in my heart Jean. I know your pain. Bailey will be loved at Rainbow Bridge. xxxxxx

Mira Dedović said...

I am so sorry. I was always waitnig for your news about Bailey, his toast time, his playful face. So sad.

sherry grainger said...

So sorry, Dear Jean. I remember your loving remarks about him as you looked forward to seeing him after your long overseas workshop tour this past year. I remember the loving portrait you did in our Seattle workshop.

wendy jewett said...

Thank you so much for sharing.....the art and the photos. As an animal owner, I know your pain and feel your grief. Know that what you share touches many

Bindi said...

So very sorry to hear of your loss of Bailey. Losing a loved pet is one of life's worst moments, and there can be many. I too have loved and lost dogs along the way, but I can still conjure up exactly how you are feeling. My heart goes out to you!

Deborah said...

I am so sorry to hear that you have lost your darling Bailey....

Your memories of Bailey will forever be with you in your heart.....

Siggi in Downeast Maine said...

A lovely tribute to the loss of Bailey. Thank you for sharing the photos..
and the painting.
Peace love and prayers.
Siggi in DownEast Maine

Just me.... said...

So very sad to hear of your loss. Our pets give us a love that is incomparable. I know mine wait for me on the rainbow bridge. 😢

K said...

Oh my, I know that heartache and I weep for you. Big hug from Wisconsin, USA

Kat Hill said...

In tears as I read about the loss of your sweet Bailey. My heart is heavy for you and your family.

Betty Long said...

So sorry to hear this news. What a beautiful dog! We lost one of our dogs one year ago, and just the other evening I found my husband sobbing, as he remembered it was the day of Maggie's passing. "Grief is the price we pay for love." Take good care of yourself.


corikay said...

My deepest and heartfelt sympathy to you and your family at this time! I understand the loss of a pet, and the depth of the grief that follows. Just remember that these sweet angels are entrusted to our care, and it is our responsibility to make those hard and tough decisions ... While you grieve, remember the joy and love that you shared with your beloved friend and pet...and I believe, they wait for us on the other side!

Val Richmond said...

I'm so sorry jean to hear of your loss. You know you are in our thoughts and prayers, Vala

Glenda said...

I'm so sorry you lost your Beloved buddy. It's so hard to loose a family member. May happy memories eventually make this loss a little easier. 🐾❤️🌈

Artist Elaine said...

My heart breaks for you; your loss is so huge and painful. To say how sorry I am for your loss seems so inadequate, but I truly am. I have an incredible rescued four-legged furbaby companion who has been with us for 10 years now. Looking at her and seeing the aging is so difficult because it reminds me that I cannot have her with me for the rest of my life, but I would if I could. She's my baby, my friend, my companion - she's family. I empathize with you completely, Jean. Your painted tribute to Bailey is beautiful and I'm glad that your art helps you to cope somewhat. Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

Artist Elaine said...

My heart breaks for you; your loss is so huge and painful. To say how sorry I am for your loss seems so inadequate, but I truly am. I have an incredible rescued four-legged furbaby companion who has been with us for 10 years now. Looking at her and seeing the aging is so difficult because it reminds me that I cannot have her with me for the rest of my life, but I would if I could. She's my baby, my friend, my companion - she's family. I empathize with you completely, Jean. Your painted tribute to Bailey is beautiful and I'm glad that your art helps you to cope somewhat. Thoughts and prayers for you and your family.

Sharron Cittick said...

So sorry to hear. Someone told me this one and it has always stuck with me. When we get a pet of anysort( expect a cockatoo or tortace that can live 100years) , we know that -hopefully- we are going to outlive that pet. We love them lots while they are here, give them a great life and feel thankful for the absolute unconditional love they have given us. I know it doesn't make the heartbreak any easier ( boy, I think I cried for 3 weeks when my last dog died a couple of years ago) but I have since got another who also has part of my heart. I wish that for you.

Hello. My name is Allison. said...

Oh, Jean. I am so sorry and saddened to read of the loss of your dear, sweet Bailey. Thinking of you and your family and sending love and prayers. Keeping you all in my heart.

Sue said...

So sorry Jean. I know how much you loved him.
Susan

Judy said...

So sorry, Jean. I remember painting him several years ago for one of your challenges.

Barbara said...

So sorry to hear this. Our pets leave such a hole in our hearts - it gets better but it never really goes away. Just believing we will see them again and knowing we gave them our love helps a little. And what love they give to us! We are the blessed ones aren't we? Those wonderful paintings of Bailey are true treasures of your love for him.

Barbara said...

Dearest Jean I'm so sorry for this news! The loss of our pets hurts so deeply, but you did your part - what Bailey needed most in his life was someone to love him, and you were there in a big way. His love back is one of life's greatest blessings - and your beautiful paintings are a such treasure to have now. My thoughts and prayers are with you and we must believe that part of the Big plan is that we will be reunited down the way.

Jacqueline said...

Such a devastating loss - we lost our "Fritzie" (miniature dachshund) last year - I feel your pain the emptiness in your heart - sending love and prayers.

Rebecca Krutsinger said...

I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved Bailey. My heart aches for you.

mojo said...

I'm sorry for your loss. How lovely and beloved he was.
Our pets are a huge blessing.
xo

mojo said...

Sorry for your loss. He was lovely and beloved.
A blessing. I really feel for you.

Graciela De Luca said...

ohhh Jean. I accompany you in your grief, we know what you love him and we will miss his antics! My heart is with you today .

Dale Rye said...

Jean, my heart is with you. Christine

Diana said...

So very sorry Jean, my heart and prayers are with you. I know your pain, I do believe one day we will be with them again and they are always with us in our hearts and souls. Love to you, Diana

Jemima said...

Dear Jean, Just returned from holiday in US to hear your sad news. So very sorry you have lost your beloved Bailey. Your painting of him is beautiful and must have been very difficult to do. My thoughts are with you. Jen Williams, Workshop- June 1st 1916

Bette Orr said...

How I wish I could say something to comfort you, dearest Jean. Grief is something we can't just shuck off, unfortunately.....its a process, and in time, we learn ro live with it. I know Bailey's spirit is with you.......waiting for your happy smiles to return. Prayers for you Jean, and many, many hugs. Bette

Carmen Calabuig said...

Me tropecé con tu artículo por casualidad, tengo una perrita de 17 años y se lo que me espera el día que parta.
Comparto tu sentimiento se por lo que estás pasando, se les ama cómo si de un familiar se tratara.
Sólo el tiempo atenuará el dolor, luego quedan esos recuerdos mágicos que nos brindaron en su paso por nuestro camino.
Las perdidas nos dejan huérfanos pero son parte de la vida, el dolor y el amor van de la mano. Un fuerte abrazo y se que muchas personas sienten cómo nosotras, te acompañamos y estamos contigo.

H.D. Campbell said...

I'm so sorry Jean.
My warmest thoughts are with you

Renae Baker said...

Oh Jean..I couldn't sleep and pulled up your blog. My heart breaks about Bailey. I'm so sad for you & have been there. I thought I would die when my 14 ye old Doberman died. That's been many years ago but I can still remember. I'm so sorry Jean. Life can hurt so much at times. I wish Bailey could have stayed with you much longer but find comfort in knowing he had such a good life & was loved so much. I was honored to meet you at your demonstration when you came to St. Louis Missouri. Renae in St. Louis area.

Lorraine Rimmelin said...

My husband always says, You can't share your life with a pet (dog) if you are not willing to say goodbye to them. I know this doesn't make the pain any less, it's just a fact Unfortunately we have had our hearts broken several times but we cherish the many beautiful years we spent with our loving companions. May you & John remember the sunshine Bailey brought into your lives and smile at the fond memories of him.
(((HUGS)))